I realize I have been missing in action on this blog. Sadly, I have not only been missing from my writing, but from my life. Somewhere in England, I lost myself. Now, I’ve been going through a period of self-discovery. It started with a last minute job I got teaching English as a Foreign Language in Oxford. Who knew a summer job could change so much?
Moving away from friends and family is never easy…except this time it was! I think that by sometimes getting out of our comfort zone and being thrust into a challenging situations entirely on our own, we are forced to develop as a person. I certainly have.
I don’t think I have changed much, what I think has happened is that I have remembered who I am. I am a person who loves to live out of a suitcase. It keeps me on my toes, it gives me freedom of movement, and most importantly an excuse to shop for things I forget! Living out of my suitcase in Oxford has taught me that I am much less materialistic than I thought. I used to think I needed to shop, spend money. It used to be the only thing that would make me feel good in my miserable life. But now, shopping is an occasional past time, but not something I need to improve my mood.
I have remembered that I am a social person! I’ve gotten used to seeing the same people, doing the same things, and I grew bored. I stopped wanting to go out because it was never something new. I thought I had grown into an introvert during my 20’s. Not so. I was just bored of my surroundings. In a new place with zero friends, I have blossomed. I talk to strangers, invite acquaintances out, go drinking, try new foods. My life feels full again, and I’m back to my usual extroverted self.
I learned to let down my guard. 3 months ago, I hated working out in a gym, and would never willingly exercise with another person. I would never take a fitness class. I was too embarrassed by my perceived lack of athletic ability. Now, I both don’t give a shit and also know I am a lot more capable than I thought. I’ve also lost a good number of inches off my entire body. I have a gym buddy that I work out with almost everyday, and I don’t care if they see me struggle. I tried an abs class for the first time, and it nearly killed me. I don’t compare myself to others at the gym anymore. And I willingly join in sports games and physical activities. Because I would rather be the worst player on the field than the best watcher on the sidelines.
Most importantly, I have learned that I am independent. I used to need to talk to my mom or friends everyday or I would feel lonely. But, living in Oxford, I have discovered I am completely ok with being alone. I don’t need other people to fill my time because my own company is more than enough. At night, I’m perfectly content sitting in my room. I’m fine with eating a meal by myself.
I know this isn’t my usual, informative post. But, I do have some life advice to offer you. If you are ever feeling stuck in your professional or personal life, get out! I don’t mean quit your job or marriage. I mean, change your surroundings. Go volunteer for 3 months in South America. Take a college course over the summer in a different state. Go to France to learn French. Force yourself to leave your physical comfort zone, and soon you will find that everything else will change as well. I think that what controls us isn’t who or what we do, but where we are. A change in destination is all that is needed to change your life.